ANKLE DEEP

Ezekiel 47

New King James Version (NKJV)

The Healing Waters and Trees

47 Then he brought me back to the door of the temple; and there was water, flowing from under the threshold of the temple toward the east, for the front of the temple faced east; the water was flowing from under the right side of the temple, south of the altar. ² He brought me out by way of the north gate, and led me around on the outside to the outer gateway that faces east; and there was water, running out on the right side.

³ And when the man went out to the east with the line in his hand, he measured one thousand cubits, and he brought me through the waters; the water came up to my ankles. ⁴ Again he measured one thousand and brought me through the waters; the water came up to my knees. Again he measured one thousand and brought me through; the water came up to my waist. ⁵ Again he measured one thousand, and it was a river that I could not cross; for the water was too deep, water in which one must swim, a river that could not be crossed. ⁶ He said to me, “Son of man, have you seen this?” Then he brought me and returned me to the bank of the river.

⁷ When I returned, there, along the bank of the river, were very many trees on one side and the other. ⁸ Then he said to me: “This water flows toward the eastern region, goes down into the valley, and enters the sea. When it reaches the sea, its waters are healed. ⁹ And it shall be that every living thing that moves, wherever the rivers go, will live. There will be a very great multitude of fish, because these waters go there; for they will be healed, and everything will live wherever the river goes. ¹⁰ It shall be that fishermen will stand by it from En Gedi to En Eglaim; they will be places for spreading their nets. Their fish will be of the same kinds as the fish of the Great Sea, exceedingly many. ¹¹ But its swamps and marshes will not be healed; they will be given over to salt. ¹² Along the bank of the river, on this side and that, will grow all kinds of trees used for food; their leaves will not wither, and their fruit will not fail. They will bear fruit every month, because their water flows from the sanctuary. Their fruit will be for food, and their leaves for medicine.”

I have five grandchildren, soon to be six.  Our oldest granddaughters are eight years old.  Our GK’s have been acclimated to the water from their very first summer since their grand arrival.  We have watched as they have gone from wading in the water to swimming without aid over their heads.  The older and more skilled they have become at swimming fear as dissipated and excitement for the water takes them over.  In fact Saturday and Sunday they were in the water from the time they got up until they went to bed.  They absolutely love playing and swimming in the water.  When one child tries something new it is not long before they have all get on the swimming bandwagon of new adventures.  I am thrilled the GK’s have a love for the water and do not fear it.  We have all known adults who do not know how to swim and actually have a fear of water and that fear keeps them from enjoying what others have grown to love and take pleasure in.  In fact it is hard to understand how a grown adult could have such a fear. 

Spiritually speaking believers are like my grandchildren.  When they first become saved because of lack of knowledge and experience they are content and feel safe just to wade around close to the shoreline where they are next to dry land and can see the bottom of the lake.  As the new believer begins to mature in their faith, gain knowledge and watch other believers they may begin to venture out into deeper waters, little by little.  Physical age does not restrict the spiritual maturing process.  There are Christians out there that have remained in an infant stage much of their life as a believer and this is made evident in Hebrews chapter six (we will touch base on that shortly).

For those of you who swim, you can all attest to the fact that swimming while there is a certain amount of work involved is very refreshing and freeing,  it’s as though no inhibition claims you and no boundaries hem you in. The more skilled you become at swimming the greater freedom and the longer you can spend in the water.

In Ezekiel 47 as this chapter advances he is first led out into ankle deep water (think of this as the point of salvation), then knee-deep, waist deep and until he is led into water where he can no longer stand, but he must swim.

Take notice he is led, he is not expected to venture off on his own.  He is led through the waters.  In verse 9 we are told where the water flows everything will live. In the Bible we are aware of the fact that water is symbolic of life and the Holy Spirit.  As he is led into the water there is an order of progression.  This progression is measured off in equal cubits of 1000.  I began to ponder this.  He measured off 1000 cubits and was led into ankle deep water – then another 1000 into knee deep water – another 1000 into waist deep water –another 1000 he was led into water so deep Ezekiel would have to swim and would not be able to cross.  Ezekiel would not be able to skip the progression of each phase he had to pass through each phase and I found it interesting that each of these “4” steps of 1000 cubits were measured of equally - appearing to be of equal importance. 

Today’s Christians want to run with this torch or swim pare say, without having made the years of preparation the saints of old had to put into place in their lives.  The older saints have a fortitude that seems to be lacking in our generation and younger; a fortitude of pressing through into full maturity.

Just to give you a little more food for thought I want to you to read a short segment out of Ira Milligan’s book: UNDERSTANDING THE DREAMS YOU DREAM –Vol. #2.  Now this is not the Bible this is a woman’s interpretation of the meaning of 1000.  Thousands are interpreted in the same way that hundreds are.  Thousand is a unit of measure like ten and hundred, and refers to “maturity”.  So one thousand is the beginning of maturity, and two thousand is mature judgment.  That’s the reason Joshua told the people to stay two thousand cubits behind the priest when they went to cross the Jordon and enter Canaan. They were to use mature judgment in following their leaders (see Joshua 3:4)…Three thousand refers to being maturely conformed, as Paul mentions in Ephesians 4:13.  Four thousand refers to mature rule.[i]

We as believers are led by the Holy Spirit, it was the Holy Spirit that wooed us to salvation and it is the Holy Spirit that continues to lead us moment by moment, desiring us to mature as believers.

In the physical realm (world) none of us would want to jump into a stagnant swamp or marsh; we would know within those types of waters is death and disease.  In fact if we were to fall into that type of water we would want to wash off as soon as possible so we would not catch a bacteria or virus of some sort.  Verse 11 indicates the swamps and marshes would not become fresh, resulting in lack of life.  I truly believe this is a clear representation of sin, rebellion and disobedience.   ¹¹ But its swamps and marshes will not be healed; they will be given over to salt.

The Bible encourages spiritual maturity.

In Hebrews 6:1-8(NLT) it says:  So let us stop going over the basic teachings about Christ again and again. Let us go on instead and become mature in our understanding. Surely we don’t need to start again with the fundamental importance of repenting from evil deeds and placing our faith in God. 
You don’t need further instruction about baptisms, the laying on of hands, the resurrection of the dead, and eternal judgment. 
And so, God willing, we will move forward to further understanding.
For it is impossible to bring back to repentance those who were once enlightened—those who have experienced the good things of heaven and shared in the Holy Spirit, 
who have tasted the goodness of the word of God and the power of the age to come—
and who then turn away from God. It is impossible to bring such people back to repentance; by rejecting the Son of God, they themselves are nailing him to the cross once again and holding him up to public shame. 
When the ground soaks up the falling rain and bears a good crop for the farmer, it has God’s blessing. 
But if a field bears thorns and thistles, it is useless. The farmer will soon condemn that field and burn it. 

Let’s not become stagnant as a swamp, marsh or a field that bears thorns and thistles, it is time to walk out into deeper water and keep going until we must swim, no we will not be able to touch or see the bottom but if we matured and increase in faith we know we will not sink and it will be refreshing and life giving. 

Hebrews goes onto say:

Hebrews 6:9-20(NLT) ....TO BE CONTINUED



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[i] Ira Milligan, Understanding the Dreams you Dream, Vol. II, (Destiny Image Publishers, Inc. 2000), 25

OPPOSITES ATTRACT - Like Magnets

Every married couple would benefit greatly if they were to take some sort of temperament profile.  The knowledge obtained in these profiles is indispensable and can be used throughout the entire marriage.  The Lord created us all uniquely and there is no “bad” temperament.  Every temperament has its strengths and weaknesses. Understanding this will enable each individual and couple, accompanied with the power of the Holy Spirit to overcome weak areas in their temperaments.  Happiness and the ability to get along in marriage is greatly dependent on how well each spouse understands his or her partner’s temperament and how willing he or she is to meet that partner’s temperament needs.

An introverted person (such as a melancholy) tends to be a loner and prefers to be at home instead of in a crowd.  This type of person likes to choose where, when and with whom they will socialize with. They are highly selective when they choose their friends and very selective at choosing a spouse.   When they choose a friend it is for life.  An introverted person needs a great deal of alone time to regenerate and process their day and each day before them; they are true “thinkers”.   They are very detail orientated and will take their time investigating any pitfall that could transpire. A melancholy (introvert) has low energy levels and they will monitor their energy throughout the day.  They show their love or communicate love by doing tasks.  The need to talk is not a high priority for them unless there is a task to be completed.  However, when they do talk or communicate they will have something very important to convey.  This presents a problem within their marriage because by the time they have processed and endeavored to communicate all their unmet needs to their spouse conflict between the couple may have escalated to a major level, because of the lack of general conversation.  Introverts generally do not require a lot of touching, hugs or kissing and their words are few (they do not say “I love you”, often) so this also causes a breakdown in the marital relationship when married to an extrovert who requires a great deal of touching, hugs and kissing and verbal – “I love you(s)”.  Making the introvert aware of their temperament and encouraging them to learn how to express themselves better with their spouse will ease marital conflict.

The extrovert (Sanguine) is high energy, extremely social and loves to talk.  It really does not matter to them what they talk about as long as they can talk.  Now, this “talking” is superficially and normally does not have “depth”; versus their melancholy partner who when they decide to talk has scrutinized every word they will say.  The extrovert loves life, and lives for the moment giving little regard to the ramification of what they do.  They can have a hot temper and blow-up very easily but five minutes later forget what caused the blow-up.  There will never be enough money for them to spend, activities to do, or noise to surround them.  Unfortunately they love to talk but their listening skills tend to be poor and their attention span is short so unless they are interested in what you are saying they may just walk away.  If you did not have the extrovert (Sanguine) there would be no party because they tend to be the life of the party, entertaining all around them.

The reason opposites attract is because the opposite has what we need to experience a fuller life.   We are not only attracted to that temperament but need them in our own life to accomplish areas we are unable to.  In other words normally we are attracted to temperaments which possess strong attributes in areas we tend to be weak in.

How to communicate needs within marriage for couples where one is extroverted and the other is introverted:

Each person needs to study their spouse’s temperaments and be aware of their strengths, weaknesses and how to meet each area of need in that spouse.

The extrovert needs to recognize this about their spouse (the introvert):

• They need alone time that is quiet to be able to regenerate before they can resolve a conflict.
• Give them advance warning of no less than a week for any activates you wish for them to participate in.
• Because part of their temperament is a fear of financial failure you yourself will need to learn to budget money.
• Never criticize your spouse in front of anyone; this would be devastating to them.
• Watch your spouse for signs of depression, know them and draw them out – help them to tell you just exactly what is going on in their head.
• As the introvert:  Learn to express your feelings, express love toward your spouse, forgive easily, and allow your spouse to get into your space.

The introvert needs to recognize this about their spouse (the extrovert):

• They have a great need to socialize and be the center of attention.  They have a high energy level and you need to help them use this energy in a constructive manner.  If they are away from people and activates for too long they will become irritated.  Learn for yourself how you can join them in activities.
• Daily they will need for you to tell them that they are loved.   Your extroverted spouse also needs a great deal of touching, hugs and kisses.  This will take you beyond your comfort zone; but you can do this through learned behavior. 
• Find ways you can become part of your spouse’s active world, even if it is in a task orientated way (that will flow well with your temperament).

Our human nature is very self-centered, which is why the Bible encourages us to die to self and put others first. As we grow and mature in the Lord and in years, we learn the great necessity of dying to self. Unfortunately, even the most spiritually mature person will succumb to the flesh and need to apply conflict resolution to their marriage. Knowing our spouse’s temperament will help equip you with the tools in how to approach your spouse reach a resolution to conflict.

The National Christian Counselors Association recognizes a combination of over 4000 different temperaments.

Opposites attract (and react): Navigating personality differences within your marriage

THE GREAT EXCHANGE

The Lord is ready willing and waiting to do a great exchange.  Many people who once loved and served the Lord have drifted away, fallen into compliancy or lost all hope and given up.  But God never breaks His promises.

Hebrews 6:15-20(TMSG)
Abraham stuck it out and got everything that had been promised to him. 
When people make promises, they guarantee them by appeal to some authority above them so that if there is any question that they’ll make good on the promise, the authority will back them up. 
When God wanted to guarantee his promises, he gave his word, a rock-solid guarantee— 
God can’t break his word. And because his word cannot change, the promise is likewise unchangeable. We who have run for our very lives to God have every reason to grab the promised hope with both hands and never let go. 
It’s an unbreakable spiritual lifeline, reaching past all appearances right to the very presence of God 
where Jesus, running on ahead of us, has taken up his permanent post as high priest for us, in the order of Melchizedek.

Today I encourage you run to God…He truly is waiting for you and will do a great exchange…you can count on that!  The Lord wants to gather you back!

Ezekiel 11:16-21(TMSG)
“Well, tell them this: ‘This is your Message from God, the Master. True, I sent you to the far country and scattered you through other lands. All the same, I’ve provided you a temporary sanctuary in the countries where you’ve gone. 
I will gather you back from those countries and lands where you’ve been scattered and give you back the land of Israel. 
You’ll come back and clean house, throw out all the rotten images and obscene idols. 
I’ll give you a new heart. I’ll put a new spirit in you. I’ll cut out your stone heart and replace it with a red-blooded, firm-muscled heart.  Then you’ll obey my statutes and be careful to obey my commands. You’ll be my people! I’ll be your God!
“‘But not those who are self-willed and addicted to their rotten images and obscene idols! I’ll see that they’re paid in full for what they’ve done.’ Decree of God, the Master.”



Violence that can Explode the Impossible

Ephesians 6:18

praying at all times in the Spirit, with all prayer and supplication. To that end keep alert with all perseverance, making supplication for all the saints,…

The last several weeks I have written blogs on the Armor of God and studying prayer is a fitting way to end this blog series on the Armor of God.

The Lord has given us as believers the power to overcome evil, to build up and spur one another on to greatness and victory! We do not have to walk around hopeless, but hopeful. We are His royal priesthood. Know who you are and the authority you have in Jesus. Prayer will not only loose Heaven’s provision in your life and marriage, it will loose Heaven’s abundance into your life and marriage.

Years ago I read a book that was written by Jack Hayford on prayer, I must have loaned it out because it is no longer in my bookcase. If memory serves me correct this was a short book that packed a punch in efforts to wake up the believer in regards to the power of prayer.  I wrote down a few statements from this book this one being my favorite: 

“The kingdom of heaven which Jesus set up as a powerful movement or reign among men (suffers violence) requires of them an equally strong and radical reaction.  The violent then who take it by force are people of keen enthusiasm and commitment who are willing to respond to and propagate with radical abandonment the message and dynamic of God’s reign.”

In my walk with the Lord I determined a long time ago if there is anything that I am going to be passionately radical about it is prayer. Even as a very young girl I remember kneeling by my bed storming the “Gates of Heaven” as some would call it.  As the years have pasted and I have grown older I cannot relent or give up regardless of what my natural eyes may or may not see.  Something within me spurs me on to believe pray is; Violence that can Explode the Impossible (Jack Hayford)!

Matthew 11:12 (NKJV) says;  "And from the days of John the Baptist until now the kingdom of heaven suffers violence, and the violent take it by force.

(NIV) MT. 11:12 From the days of John the Baptist until now, the kingdom of heaven has been forcefully advancing, and forceful men lay hold of it.

971. biazo, bee-ad'-zo; from G970; to force, i.e. (reflex.) to crowd oneself (into), or (pass.) to be seized:--press, suffer violence.

Violent:  physical force or activity used to cause harm, damage, or abuse, exhibiting intense emotional or mental excitement: passionate intensity “heat” (Webster Dictionary).

Force:  to compel to do something or to act, to obtain  by coercion; to bring forth, as with effort; to move or drive against resistance; to break down by force; to press or impose; as one’s will.  Strong-effective-powerful-vigorous (Webster Dictionary).

We are to follow the example of Jesus and that includes the example of how Jesus prayed.  Jesus exhibited passion when he prayed and His heart was revealed as He prayed.

Hebrews 5:7-9 (NKJV)  who, in the days of His flesh, when He had offered up prayers and supplications, with vehement cries and tears to Him who was able to save Him from death, and was heard because of His godly fear, though He was a Son, yet He learned obedience by the things which He suffered. And having been perfected, He became the author of eternal salvation to all who obey Him,

Vehement or strong:  2478. ischuros, is-khoo-ros'; from G2479; forcible (lit. or fig.):--boisterous, mighty (-ier), powerful, strong (-er, man), valiant.

Cries:  G2906/G296 outcry, tumult, grief, clamour, cry

John 11:33-36 Therefore, when Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who came with her weeping, He groaned in the spirit and was troubled. And He said, "Where have you laid him?" They said to Him, "Lord, come and see." Jesus wept. Then the Jews said, "See how He loved him!"

Wept:  burst into sudden tears, then silently wept, wailing, heaving of the bosom-and the cry of a soul in agony.

Groaned: to utter a deep prolonged sound of disapproval or pain.  G1690/G1722 to snort with anger, murmur against

Troubled:  G5015 to stir or agitate

There are times in our lives when we just do not know what words to pray and there are no words that we could possible formulate from our mouth that seem adequate for the intensity of the situation. That is when we can allow the Holy Spirit to move within us and pray through us.

Romans 8:26-27(ESV) Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.  And he who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. 

We have a promise and rested assured, the Lord always keeps His promises.

Acts 2:38-39(ESV) And Peter said to them, “Repent and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins, and you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit.  For the promise is for you and for your children and for all who are far off, everyone whom the Lord our God calls to himself.” 

Acts 2:1-4(ESV)
When the day of Pentecost arrived, they were all together in one place.  And suddenly there came from heaven a sound like a mighty rushing wind, and it filled the entire house where they were sitting.  And divided tongues as of fire appeared to them and rested on each one of them.  And they were all filled with the Holy Spirit and began to speak in other tongues as the Spirit gave them utterance.

Think of Prayer as: violence that can explode the impossible!

THE HAPPIEST MOTHER'S DAY

My daughters have grown now and our oldest daughter has three children, daughter #2 has two children and daughter #3 well she has what we call; “baby Monk in the trunk”.  One of my often replies to my daughters is; “the greatest gift you can give me is to raise my grandchildren up in the house of the Lord.  Teach them to Love the Lord Jesus and follow Him. Raise them up to be mighty warriors for the Lord.  Sing to them and teach them the Word of God.

Yes, that is right – there could be no greater gift for this woman than to see her family loving and serving Jesus.  This is my Mother’s Day wish forever and always. 

This is my wish for you today – this Mother’s Day, may your children and your legacy be:

Planted in the house of the Lord, they will flourish in the courts of our God.  They will stay fresh and green, proclaiming, “The Lord is upright; he is my rock, and there is no wickedness in him.  Psalms 92:13-15 (NIV)

Father God,

May this Mother’s Day be a day of answered prayer for all the Mother’s whose hearts cry out to you for the sake of their children…Lord Jesus fulfill the desires of love that flow out of the hearts of mothers.  Amen.

Romans 10:9-13(ESV)
because, if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For with the heart one believes and is justified, and with the mouth one confesses and is saved. For the Scripture says, “Everyone who believes in him will not be put to shame.” For there is no distinction between Jew and Greek; the same Lord is Lord of all, bestowing his riches on all who call on him.  For “everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.”



NO “OUT-LAW” RELATIONSHIPS ALLOWED!

The prize for having survived parenthood is grandchildren; just ask any Grandparent.  With this new season of life both the parents and grandparents come into unchartered territory in the relationship arena.  One would think the joy of new life would conquer any minor or major issues that arise in regards to these new roles of parenting and grandparents; that is a fallacy.

To avoid these pitfalls healthy boundary lines in relationships between married children and parents should be established prior to the children’s marriage. 

Parents (future Grandparents) when your children marry; your parenting days are over.  Unless the married children ask for your advice or insight you would be wise not to interfere.  Now is the time to trust what you have instilled in your children to be enough to guide them through life.  Yes, there will be times that they may need your help or insight but you should not be taken advantage of either.  If there is not a healthy separation when they marry the married children will form an unhealthy co-dependency upon you.  This unhealthy co-dependency will not allow them to grow, mature and establish a strong independent family unit of their own.

Married children; the best thing you could do prior to marriage is take a solid pre-marriage counseling course.  This course will help you both to evaluate what life was like prior to marriage and how you as a couple desire to have your family unit formed.  What type of foundation do you want to establish for your family and build upon?  If you have been married for some time and you have not established these guidelines and boundaries now is the time to institute parameters for your family.  It is fine for you as a family unit to develop your own traditions.  In fact you may want to incorporate some of the traditions you both had as you grew up in your parent’s homes.  It is up to you as new parents or soon to be parents to decide what part you want your parents as grandparents to play in your children’s lives.

• Go on a date with the sole purpose of discussing child rearing.
• Form a team and determine together you will not undermine each other.
• Some compromise may need to take place on both of your parts to be able to come to an agreement that you both can live by.
• Decide; how do we want our parents involved in our children’s live, remember you are the parent now and childrearing is now part of your role.
• Regardless of what you decide, respect your parents after all they spent their life raising, and nurturing you.
• You may need to take each set of parents out to dinner and express how excited you are that they will be a part of your children’s lives and discuss what role they would like to play as Grandparents.  Ask them specifically; how do they envision their role to be as grandparents?  Hint, if you allow them to come up with some boundaries and they think it is their idea….well you have accomplished your goal.  Your parents most likely used this psychology on you more than once.
• If you include the Grandparents from the get go and what you see their part as, there will be less surprises for you to contend with latter.
• Beware even the best laid plans will have some issues that need ironed out and if you approach these issues in a mature calm fashion your parents (the grandparents) will respect your maturity and judgment and realize they did a pretty good job in raising you. 
• An example of an area of conflict:  One set of grandparents believe in sprinkling the baby for baptism shortly after birth, the other set of grandparents believe in dedicating the baby to the Lord and baptism by submersion is for later in life.  What do you as a couple believe?  Know what you believe and why you believe it.
• The Bible has great insight in this area of marriage in Genesis 2:24 (NKJV) it says; Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. In the King James Version it says: “And shall cleave unto his wife” (Genesis 2:24, KJV). The word cleave means: “To cling to or adhere to, abide fast, cleave fast together, follow close and hard after, be joined together, keep fast, overtake, pursue hard, stick to, take, catch by pursuit, cement together, to stick like glue, welded together so that the two cannot be separated without damage to both (Strong’s Exhaustive Concordance, H1692).” When something is cemented or welded together, it is one. It would take a great deal of major demolition equipment to separate or destroy it.

Psalms 127:1(NLT) Unless the LORD builds a house, the work of the builders is wasted. Unless the LORD protects a city, guarding it with sentries will do no good.

Psalms 144:12(NLT) May our sons flourish in their youth like well-nurtured plants.      May our daughters be like graceful pillars, carved to beautify a palace.

Proverbs 14:26(NLT) Those who fear the LORD are secure; he will be a refuge for their children.

3 John 1:4(NLT) I could have no greater joy than to hear that my children are following the truth. 

Psalms 145:4(NLT) Let each generation tell its children of your mighty acts; let them proclaim your power.

Proverbs 13:22(NLT) Good people leave an inheritance to their grandchildren, but the sinner’s wealth passes to the godly.

Proverbs 17:6(NLT) Grandchildren are the crowning glory of the aged; parents are the pride of their children.

Trust me, establishing healthy relationships between parents, grandparents, grandchildren is well worth any effort it may take!  These relationships can truly be a very rewarding and a source of great love, security and comfort to all involved.

WHAT EMPTY NEST?

I am not certain how the term empty nest came about when referring to parents whose children have left home.  When I mull this term through my mind it seems to me our “land” has greatly expanded.  I realize bird’s grandbirds do not come home for a visit nor do they babysit for those grandbirds; but let’s be real here, once our children leave home the multiplication factor kicks in.  In fact our grandchildren (GK’s) make themselves right at home when they come to our house.  The car doors fly open and you can hear the announcement of their arrival before they touch the doorknob.  We love it!

Isaiah 54:2(ESV)
    “Enlarge the place of your tent, and let the curtains of your habitations be stretched out; do not hold back; lengthen your cords and strengthen your stakes.

We are living this passage in more ways than one!

Married couples - the most important tip in dealing with the empty nest syndrome is; become each other’s best friends prior to the children leaving home.

• Always put your spouse above yourself, think of them first and do for them first.
• Find ways daily to be a blessing to your spouse.  Blessing will begat blessing.  Eventually your spouse will reciprocate and both of you will absolutely love being around each other 24x7.
• Be experts at conflict resolution.  Know how to resolve your issues in a calm quick manner.
• Start taking walks, not only is the exercise good for you but you will both talk with one another sharing your life, hopes and dreams.
• Discover what interest or hobbies you both have and share them together. Examples:  walking, biking, boating, kayaking, tennis, cross country skiing, golf, and if sports are not your forte try:  cards, puzzles, gardening, landscaping – I think you get the idea.
• Learn how to compromise and enjoy what your spouse may enjoy even if it is not your favorite thing to do.
• Volunteer in a ministry or non-profit organization together.  This will cause a greater intimacy in your relationship and will be very rewarding also.
• Do your chores together – two hands are better than one and you will be surprised how quickly the time will fly by as you accomplish the mundane.
• Whatever projects your spouse is involved in, find a way to become part of it and enjoy it with them.
• Once grandchildren have come on the scene, play a paramount role in their life.  Developing a close relationship will the grandchildren will bring years of a very special close knit family.

Finding ways to enjoy life together and fill in the timeframes that would have been prior taken by the children will reduce the anxiety of; what will I do with myself now.  This will also keep you from becoming overly involved in your childrens lives when they are endevouring to establish their own families and homes.

If you are a single empty nester, following the tips above by yourself or with a close friend will benefit you also.

We have been empty nesters for eleven years now.  Occasionally my heart (Penny) will feel the achy – I wish my children were young again.  However, the majority of the time we are thrilled to spend our days with each other as best friends.  We are able to do things we could not do when the children lived at home.  Our time that we spend together now is treasured and valuable; we believe it is a gift!

Psalms 16:6(ESV)
    The lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; indeed, I have a beautiful inheritance.