GOBBLE GOBBLE

GOBBLE GOBBLE

This time next week we will be partaking of that wonderful turkey dinner with all the fixings’.  I love the traditional Thanksgiving celebration with all the family gathering together; the food, smells, crisp air and the atmosphere of thankful hearts celebrating another year of blessings.  The family sharing with each other, what has been happening in their lives, fulfilling that much needed one on one interaction with the ones you love. The Thanksgiving Day parades serenade us as we put the final touches on the meal that took two days to prepare and 15 minutes devour.  Just before we partake of the succulent meal we bow in prayer and each person remains in respectful silence as one by one a prayer of thanksgiving is said. After we have eaten to our fill, it is time for football. The excitement of the Lions winning has created just enough hunger to shovel the down the pumpkin pie smothered in whip cream.  We love it!

Now I just painted you a Rockwell picture and if truth be told you will say; I don’t know whose house you have been going to each year!  Yes this is true.  All of us long for that perfect family gathering with totally peace, joy and love.  Chances are all of us have experienced a less than desirable Thanksgiving setting.  But why is that?

A few days ago I was watching TV and a Thanksgiving commercial came on.  The commercial shows the whole family gathered, and table is set to perfection with all the food in place.  The family then goes outside and locks themselves out of the house.  Now they are looking through the window trying to figure out how to get back into the house.  To their horror their dog is advancing on their Thanksgiving feast.  We have those fire exit doorknobs on our house.  Dan and I both have locked ourselves out.  The problem with those doors is; you can open them from the inside regardless of whether or not the door is locked.  Exit your home, try to re-enter and next thing you know, you’re locked out!

I can certainly identify with Thanksgiving blunders.  One year as always I spent two days preparing our feast.  I had baked 4 pumpkin pies the day before as usual.  Well Thanksgiving Day we ate our meal.  I served the desert.  The pumpkin pie looked and smelled absolutely delicious.  Just as I was chowing down on my first bite I discovered I had forgotten to add sugar to the pumpkin mix.  Fortunately this transpired when we lived in Hudsonville and I was only 5 minutes from Family Fare.  I quickly drove to the store to pay through the nose for whatever desert was leftover.  The good news was the overpriced cheese cake was very good but when you are longing for pumpkin pie……………..

Isn’t that just like life, you think every detail has been taken care of then, surprise, surprise, surprise (as Gomer Pyle / Jim Nabors) would say.

How can it be that something that looks so good on the outside, absolutely picture perfect, can be so nasty in the inside or fall apart in an instant? And without notice the dog eats your dinner.  That is okay because you forgot to put the sugar in the pie.

The answer to that question is because we live in a world where sin affects everything.  All of us have faced disappointments, setbacks, trials, failures and etc. How we react to those issues of life may determine how that issue affects our future.  Many of us “let the little foxes still our grapes”.  Sometimes we can even get through the big issues or disasters only to succumb to a series of “little issues”. 

This Thanksgiving I pray we truly all will reflect on the blessings the Lord has given us this past year.  I pray we will be flexible and at peace as we interact with family, friends and all the little quirks that come with them.  Chances are those “quirks” come out of hurts, stresses and disappoints.  There will be some blunders, go ahead and laugh at yourself, just shake it off.

And I will leave you with the most important ingredients for the best Thanksgiving recipe:

Leviticus 22:29(NKJV)
And when you offer a sacrifice of thanksgiving to the Lord, offer it of your own free will. 

Psalms 26:7(NKJV)
    That I may proclaim with the voice of thanksgiving,     And tell of all Your wondrous works.

Psalms 50:14(NKJV)
    Offer to God thanksgiving,     And pay your vows to the Most High.

Psalms 69:30(NKJV)
    I will praise the name of God with a song,     And will magnify Him with thanksgiving.

Psalms 95:2(NKJV)
    Let us come before His presence with thanksgiving;     Let us shout joyfully to Him with psalms.

Psalms 100:4(NKJV)
    Enter into His gates with thanksgiving,      And into His courts with praise.     Be thankful to Him, and bless His name.

Psalms 107:22(NKJV)
    Let them sacrifice the sacrifices of thanksgiving,     And declare His works with rejoicing.

2 Corinthians 4:15(NKJV)
For all things are for your sakes, that grace, having spread through the many, may cause thanksgiving to abound to the glory of God.

Colossians 3:15(NKJV)
And let the peace of God rule in your hearts, to which also you were called in one body; and be thankful. 

Colossians 4:2(NKJV)
Continue earnestly in prayer, being vigilant in it with thanksgiving; 

Revelation 7:12(NKJV)
saying:      “Amen! Blessing and glory and wisdom,     Thanksgiving and honor and power and might,     Be to our God forever and ever.     Amen.”

Blessings to you and your family this Thanksgiving!!





THE PRICE IS RIGHT

THE PRICE IS RIGHT

I have a customer who has several locations throughout Michigan.  One amazing common thread these employees have regardless of their location is; they are adamant to take their lunch break at 11:30 am so they can enjoy their lunch as they watch - THE PRICE IS RIGHT.  I am certain if you own a TV you have watched this show at least a dozen times and Bob Barker’s name is an icon.  Bob hosted this show for 35 years and Drew is the new host - just seems odd to me. However, what seems so comical to me is, as I observe my classes, as they watch THE PRICE IS RIGHT, - is the fact of how interactive they become for this 30 minutes.  I feel like I am in the live audience.

The last several days my mailbox as well as my email has been deluged with pre-Black Friday sale ads.  The lure is to convince you to buy now while – The Price Is Right.  Fortunately I absolutely hate shopping!  Yes I am a woman and to top that we raised three daughters who love to shop.  They already are making plans on how their Black Friday shopping adventure will transpire.  When the girls were teenagers I had to institute a rule; no looking at the Sunday paper until after church.  This was to cut down on the fighting over the ads that would take place every Sunday morning before church.  Eventually I also had to say, “no shopping on Sundays” because I began to dread Sundays.

I started thinking about the price of salvation.  Salvation cost us absolutely nothing but it cost the Son of God His life.  Praise the Lord the story did not stay in the grave.  The resurrection power bust forth paving a way for us to experience eternal life and escape hell’s flames.  Not only do we receive freedom from hell but the word salvation comes from Sozo, meaning nothing lacking, nothing missing.  This means that healing, deliverance, and provision have been included in our salvation gift.  In fact a day will come when we receive “rewards” for what we have done on this earth.  Now that sounds great, however that will cost us something, our willingness to serve the King.  I have often thought about my life wondering if what I have done as I serve my King will gain any type of reward.  In one respect that sounds boastful but not when you look at the flip side……………….. 

1 Corinthians 3:12-17(NKJV)
Now if anyone builds on this foundation with gold, silver, precious stones, wood, hay, straw,  each one’s work will become clear; for the Day will declare it, because it will be revealed by fire; and the fire will test each one’s work, of what sort it is.  If anyone’s work which he has built on it endures, he will receive a reward.  If anyone’s work is burned, he will suffer loss; but he himself will be saved, yet so as through fire. (to me, entering Heaven with hell’s flames trying to lick my feet sounds horrifying!)Do you not know that you are the temple of God and that the Spirit of God dwells in you?  If anyone defiles the temple of God, God will destroy him. For the temple of God is holy, which temple you are.

I have been a Christian since I was a young girl.  When I face judgment day I want to know that I have somehow served my King.  Hopefully there will be a reward for me, but I am the only person that can make sure the life I live here on earth is advancing the kingdom of Heaven.  Now I am not saying this for merely gaining a reward, but to know the One I love and serve, I have not failed.

I encourage you to read the following verses that give us insights into the rewards that can await us in Heaven.

1 Corinthians 3:8(NKJV)
Now he who plants and he who waters are one, and each one will receive his own reward according to his own labor.

1 Corinthians 9:25(NKJV)
And everyone who competes for the prize is temperate in all things. Now they do it to obtain a perishable crown, but we for an imperishable crown. 

Revelation 2:23(NKJV)
I will kill her children with death, and all the churches shall know that I am He who searches the minds and hearts. And I will give to each one of you according to your works.

Revelation 22:12(NKJV)
“And behold, I am coming quickly, and My reward is with Me, to give to every one according to his work. 

The Bible talks about five crowns.

The Crown of Righteousness:

2 Timothy 4:7-8(NKJV)
I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. 
Finally, there is laid up for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will give to me on that Day, and not to me only but also to all who have loved His appearing.

The Incorruptible Crown:

1 Corinthians 9:24-27(NKJV)
Do you not know that those who run in a race all run, but one receives the prize? Run in such a way that you may obtain it. 
And everyone who competes for the prize is temperate in all things. Now they do it to obtain a perishable crown, but we for an imperishable crown. 
Therefore I run thus: not with uncertainty. Thus I fight: not as one who beats the air. 
But I discipline my body and bring it into subjection, lest, when I have preached to others, I myself should become disqualified.

The Crown of Life:

Revelation 2:10(NKJV)
Do not fear any of those things which you are about to suffer. Indeed, the devil is about to throw some of you into prison, that you may be tested, and you will have tribulation ten days. Be faithful until death, and I will give you the crown of life.

The Crown of Rejoicing:

1 Thessalonians 2:19-20(NKJV)
For what is our hope, or joy, or crown of rejoicing? Is it not even you in the presence of our Lord Jesus Christ at His coming? 
For you are our glory and joy.

The Crown of Glory:

1 Peter 5:1-4(NKJV)
The elders who are among you I exhort, I who am a fellow elder and a witness of the sufferings of Christ, and also a partaker of the glory that will be revealed: 
Shepherd the flock of God which is among you, serving as overseers, not by compulsion but willingly, not for dishonest gain but eagerly; 
nor as being lords over those entrusted to you, but being examples to the flock; 
and when the Chief Shepherd appears, you will receive the crown of glory that does not fade away.

How shall we serve our King?  What price are we willing to pay?



STEP OUT OF THE BOAT? or Step Into the Boat!

STEP OUT OF THE BOAT?

Or

STEP INTO THE BOAT!

One morning as I was endeavoring to wake up I was staring at our fireplace mantel.  Our fireplace mantle is adorned with several SNOW BABIES (Snow Babies are collectible figurines).  Three of these figurines are boats with three babies in them.  We have heard the phrase; “Step Out of the Boat.” This phrase is in regards to us exercising our faith and is referring to the scripture in Matthew 14:28-29(NKJV) And Peter answered Him and said, “Lord, if it is You, command me to come to You on the water.” So He said, “Come.” And when Peter had come down out of the boat, he walked on the water to go to Jesus. 

I was curious about how many hits Google would reveal if I put this phrase in the search engine; Step Out of the Boat.  Google produced 52,500,000 results for this phrase.  Thousands of sermons have been preached and several books have been written on this subject of exercising your faith.  Here are a few titles of books on the subject (I am not endorsing these books because I have not read them):

Step Out of the Boat by Joel Osteen

If You Want To Walk On Water, You’ve Got To Get Out of The Boat by John Ortberg

Step Out Of The Boat God Is Waiting To Do Miracles by Levi Land

What began to stir in my heart was:  Before you can step out of the boat, you must get into the boat! 

I believe the reason why so many of us fail in exercising our faith and begin to sink, is the fact; we have not prepared ourselves spiritually.  Instead of becoming mature believers many of us have remained infant Christians.

I think a great question to ask ourselves is:  What does the boat represent?

When Matthew 14:22-36 is read much focus is given to verses 28-31 and that is great; however, I think we need to take a serious look at the verses prior to and after verses 28-31.  In Matthew 14:15-21 is the story of Jesus feeding the 5000+.  The people are hungry and it was a deserted place without the availability for a food source.  Jesus tells the disciples to give them something to eat.  The disciples tell Jesus what they have and we know the story of how 5 loaves and 2 fish feed over 5000+ with leftovers.  The disciples again witness more miracles.

In Matthew 14:22 (NKJV) it says: Immediately Jesus made His disciples get into the boat and go before Him to the other side, while He sent the multitudes away. 

Jesus made (strongly urged) his disciples to get into the boat and go to the other side, ahead of Him.  Jesus gave the disciples an assignment; He told them what His next plan was for them.  Great miracles were to take place on the other side in Gennesaret (Matthew 14:34-36).

Ask yourself, what does this boat represent? 

• They had to be skilled (learned, taught) in order to navigate through elements
• A way the reach a destination
• Unity – working together to arrive at destination
• Safety through rough waters
• A means of life support, financially (a trade) and physically
• What needs to be done to the boat to make it sea worthy?
• What skills need to be honed?
• What supplies need to be on board?
• Is this all about being prepared to complete an assignment ahead of us?

Ask the Holy Spirit to reveal to you other things this boat could represent.

Now let’s read these passages as a whole.

Matthew 14:22-36(NKJV)
Immediately Jesus made His disciples get into the boat and go before Him to the other side, while He sent the multitudes away. 
And when He had sent the multitudes away, He went up on the mountain by Himself to pray. Now when evening came, He was alone there.  (Jesus spends time in pray preparing for what is to occur in Gennesaret.)But the boat was now in the middle of the sea, tossed by the waves, for the wind was contrary. (The disciples were skilled boaters many fishermen by trade, they were use to rough waters)Now in the fourth watch of the night Jesus went to them, walking on the sea.  (3am-6am)And when the disciples saw Him walking on the sea, they were troubled, saying, “It is a ghost!” And they cried out for fear. (In the dark it would have been difficult to see, chances are they had very minimal lighting.)But immediately Jesus spoke to them, saying, “Be of good cheer! It is I; do not be afraid.”
And Peter answered Him and said, “Lord, if it is You, command me to come to You on the water.” (Peter is the one who asked to come to Jesus, Jesus only said come after Peter asked.  I think the original assignment was for them to go to the other side.)So He said, “Come.” And when Peter had come down out of the boat, he walked on the water to go to Jesus. 
But when he saw that the wind was boisterous, he was afraid; and beginning to sink he cried out, saying, “Lord, save me!”
And immediately Jesus stretched out His hand and caught him, and said to him, “O you of little faith, why did you doubt?” 
And when they got into the boat, the wind ceased.
Then those who were in the boat came and worshiped Him, saying, “Truly You are the Son of God.”
When they had crossed over, they came to the land of Gennesaret. (And now great miracles are about to take place.) And when the men of that place recognized Him, they sent out into all that surrounding region, brought to Him all who were sick, 
and begged Him that they might only touch the hem of His garment. And as many as touched it were made perfectly well.

I do not want to minimize the scripture where Peter gets out of the boat and walks on water until his faith fails…please do not get me wrong…however…

When we study the scriptures of what took place prior to Matthew 14:28-31, it is very clear Jesus was preparing the disciples to serve others as He was doing.  Let’s read:

 
Matthew 9:35-38(NKJV)
Then Jesus went about all the cities and villages, teaching in their synagogues, preaching the gospel of the kingdom, and healing every sickness and every disease among the people. 
But when He saw the multitudes, He was moved with compassion for them, because they were weary and scattered, like sheep having no shepherd. 
Then He said to His disciples, “The harvest truly is plentiful, but the laborers are few. 
Therefore pray the Lord of the harvest to send out laborers into His harvest.”

Matthew 10:1-8(NKJV)
And when He had called His twelve disciples to Him, He gave them power over unclean spirits, to cast them out, and to heal all kinds of sickness and all kinds of disease. 
Now the names of the twelve apostles are these: first, Simon, who is called Peter, and Andrew his brother; James the son of Zebedee, and John his brother; 
Philip and Bartholomew; Thomas and Matthew the tax collector; James the son of Alphaeus, and Lebbaeus, whose surname was Thaddaeus; 
Simon the Canaanite, and Judas Iscariot, who also betrayed Him.
These twelve Jesus sent out and commanded them, saying: “Do not go into the way of the Gentiles, and do not enter a city of the Samaritans. 
But go rather to the lost sheep of the house of Israel. 
And as you go, preach, saying, ‘The kingdom of heaven is at hand.’ 
Heal the sick, cleanse the lepers, raise the dead, cast out demons. Freely you have received, freely give. 

You can also look up and read Mark 6:7-12, Luke 9:1-6.

Here again Jesus teaches the disciples how to serve the people.

Mark 9:18-19(NKJV)
And wherever it seizes him, it throws him down; he foams at the mouth, gnashes his teeth, and becomes rigid. So I spoke to Your disciples, that they should cast it out, but they could not.”
He answered him and said, “O faithless generation, how long shall I be with you? How long shall I bear with you? Bring him to Me.” 

Mark 9:28-29(NKJV)
And when He had come into the house, His disciples asked Him privately, “Why could we not cast it out?”
So He said to them, “This kind can come out by nothing but prayer and fasting.”

John 14:12-14(NKJV)
“Most assuredly, I say to you, he who believes in Me, the works that I do he will do also; and greater works than these he will do, because I go to My Father. 
And whatever you ask in My name, that I will do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son. 
If you ask anything in My name, I will do it.

Also you can read Mark 16:15-18, John 20:21-23, Acts 1:4-7, Acts 2: 1-4,

Acts 2:38-39(NKJV)
Then Peter said to them, “Repent, and let every one of you be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins; and you shall receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. 
For the promise is to you and to your children, and to all who are afar off, as many as the Lord our God will call.”

Now I could have spent several more hours developing this study and the blog would have ended up being 50 pages long (hum, maybe a new book on the horizon).  I do not think you want to read 50 pages.  So I encourage you, look up these passages in your Bible pray and ask the Holy Spirit to illuminate and give you deep understanding.  Ask the Lord to show you how to apply His Word to your life.  To know how the serve the King we need to know how the King came to serve.  Learn what Jesus did in Matthew, Mark, Luke and John.  Learn how the disciples carried out the work of the Kingdom throughout the rest on the New Testament.

Conclusion:  You need to get into the boat, before you can step out of the boat!!  Have you gotten in to the boat?



TIME IS AT HAND ~ TICK TOCK ~ TICK TOCK

TIME IS AT HAND

TICK TOCK - TICK TOCK

We have an antique grandfathers’ clock that Dan’s mother gave us.  The clock stands in our living room next to the fireplace.  Every thirty minutes this clock chimes and of course on the hour it dongs the number of that hour.  If there is no other noise going on in the house you can distinctively hear the tick tock, tick tock.  Sixteen months ago, we moved out to the lake house full-time and soon after that began to realize the clock was not conducive for sleeping.  Due to the age of the clock, you can only turn off the sound by stopping the clock.  Therefore, for the last sixteen months, time has stood still for the grandfathers’ clock.  I often wish I could make time standstill, but time stands still for no man or woman.  Faded memories of days gone by, those very special moments you wish could last forever, become more distant with each tick tock, tick tock. 

When I was a young mother, the words of older women always irritated me when they would say; “the kids will grow up before you know, enjoy them while they are young”.  Now I find I am the older woman saying that ~ sigh. 

We have all been given the same 24 hours a day to do with as we please.  Some of us use those hours wisely, others waste their time on meaningless trivia.  All of us wish there were certain things in life we could redo.  However, we can only move forward and make the most out of today and tomorrows. 

I feel like many of us have grown very numb to what is happening around us because we are so wrapped up in our own world and yes, life is busy.  Time is at hand and all of creation is crying out begging for our attention pointing to the most amazing event history will ever portray.  Yes, the Lord is going to return just as He promised.  Urgency of this moment is begging us to pay attention, why are we numb?  Why are we not seeing what is surrounding us, screaming in our deaf ears.  I am just as guilty as the next person is.  Lord Jesus wake up your Bride, do not let us sleep!  Stir up our spirit to attention and enable us for the Kingdom work!

We are to keep watch:

(Mark 13:19 NKJV)  "For in those days there will be tribulation, such as has not been since the beginning of the creation which God created until this time, nor ever shall be.

(Rom 1:20 NKJV)  For since the creation of the world His invisible attributes are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even His eternal power and Godhead, so that they are without excuse,

(Rom 8:19 NKJV)  For the earnest expectation of the creation eagerly waits for the revealing of the sons of God.

(Rom 8:21 NKJV)  because the creation itself also will be delivered from the bondage of corruption into the glorious liberty of the children of God.

(Rom 8:22 NKJV)  For we know that the whole creation groans and labors with birth pangs together until now.

(Mat 24:42 NKJV)  "Watch therefore, for you do not know what hour your Lord is coming.

(Mat 25:13 NKJV)  "Watch therefore, for you know neither the day nor the hour in which the Son of Man is coming.

 (Mark 13:33 NKJV)  "Take heed, watch and pray; for you do not know when the time is.

(Mark 13:35 NKJV)  "Watch therefore, for you do not know when the master of the house is coming; in the evening, at midnight, at the crowing of the rooster, or in the morning;

(Mark 13:37 NKJV)  "And what I say to you, I say to all: Watch!"

Mark 24:  20 NKJV  "And pray that your flight may not be in winter or on the Sabbath.

21  "For then there will be great tribulation, such as has not been since the beginning of the world until this time, no, nor ever shall be.

22  "And unless those days were shortened, no flesh would be saved; but for the elect's sake those days will be shortened.

23  "Then if anyone says to you, 'Look, here is the Christ!' or 'There!' do not believe it.

24  "For false christs and false prophets will rise and show great signs and wonders to deceive, if possible, even the elect.

25  "See, I have told you beforehand.

26  "Therefore if they say to you, 'Look, He is in the desert!' do not go out; or 'Look, He is in the inner rooms!' do not believe it.

27  "For as the lightning comes from the east and flashes to the west, so also will the coming of the Son of Man be.

28  "For wherever the carcass is, there the eagles will be gathered together.

29  "Immediately after the tribulation of those days the sun will be darkened, and the moon will not give its light; the stars will fall from heaven, and the powers of the heavens will be shaken.

30  "Then the sign of the Son of Man will appear in heaven, and then all the tribes of the earth will mourn, and they will see the Son of Man coming on the clouds of heaven with power and great glory.

31  "And He will send His angels with a great sound of a trumpet, and they will gather together His elect from the four winds, from one end of heaven to the other.

(Luke 21:36 NKJV)  "Watch therefore, and pray always that you may be counted worthy to escape all these things that will come to pass, and to stand before the Son of Man."

(Rev 3:3 NKJV)  "Remember therefore how you have received and heard; hold fast and repent. Therefore if you will not watch, I will come upon you as a thief, and you will not know what hour I will come upon you.

Not only are we to keep watch, we have been commissioned:

Mark 16:  17 (NKJV)  "And these signs will follow those who believe: In My name they will cast out demons; they will speak with new tongues;

18  "they will take up serpents; and if they drink anything deadly, it will by no means hurt them; they will lay hands on the sick, and they will recover."

19  So then, after the Lord had spoken to them, He was received up into heaven, and sat down at the right hand of God.

20  And they went out and preached everywhere, the Lord working with them and confirming the word through the accompanying signs. Amen.

(Mat 10:7 -8 NKJV)  "And as you go, preach, saying, 'The kingdom of heaven is at hand.'  "Heal the sick, cleanse the lepers, raise the dead, cast out demons. Freely you have received, freely give.

Now I do realize we do not all have the temperament of an evangelist but the Bible does say: 

1 Cor. 12:1-11  Now concerning spiritual gifts, brethren, I do not want you to be ignorant:

2  You know that you were Gentiles, carried away to these dumb idols, however you were led.

3  Therefore I make known to you that no one speaking by the Spirit of God calls Jesus accursed, and no one can say that Jesus is Lord except by the Holy Spirit.

4  There are diversities of gifts, but the same Spirit.

5  There are differences of ministries, but the same Lord.

6  And there are diversities of activities, but it is the same God who works all in all.

7  But the manifestation of the Spirit is given to each one for the profit of all:

8  for to one is given the word of wisdom through the Spirit, to another the word of knowledge through the same Spirit,

9  to another faith by the same Spirit, to another gifts of healings by the same Spirit,

10  to another the working of miracles, to another prophecy, to another discerning of spirits, to another different kinds of tongues, to another the interpretation of tongues.

11  But one and the same Spirit works all these things, distributing to each one individually as He wills.

Tick Tock, Tick, Tock it is time to find your sweet spot.  How you can flourish in proclaiming the kingdom of God?  We have all been given gifts….time is at hand.



RETIRING THE BOXING GLOVES

RETIRING THE BOXING GLOVES

Have you ever felt like putting a pair of boxing gloves on and duke it out with your spouse?  I am sure we have all been there.  A truer statement would be; “duct tape their hands behind their back, duct tape their mouth shut, put on your gloves and have at it.  I certainly would not be an advocate of that type of behavior, although truth be told it has run across my mind more than once!  Why is that?

In James 4:1-3 (NKJV) it says:

Where do wars and fights come from among you? Do they not come from your desires for pleasure that war in your members? You lust and do not have. You murder and covet and cannot obtain. You fight and war. Yet you do not have because you do not ask. You ask and do not receive, because you ask amiss, that you may spend it on your pleasures.

Our human nature is very self-centered, which is why the Bible encourages us to die to self and put others first. As we grow and mature in the Lord and in years, we learn the great necessity of dying to self. Unfortunately, even the most spiritually mature person will succumb to the flesh and need to apply conflict resolution to their marriage. We all deal with anger from time to time. Some people have learned to control this emotion; others let anger control them. Anger is a secondary emotion. There is always an underlying cause. We must choose as individuals to control anger and not let it control us. Because anger is internally created, it can be internally managed. The anger often stems from an unmet expectation that was unrealistic in nature. Anger in and of itself is not sin. How we express anger determines whether or not we sin.

According to Ephesians 4:26-27 (NKJV) it says, “‘Be angry, and do not sin’: do not let the sun go down on your wrath, nor give place to the devil.” Couples must make a plan on how they are going to resolve issues in a mature manner that does not break down or destroy the other person. We must make ourselves adapt a calmer lifestyle. Many times a release of anger in outburst has nothing to do with why we are really angry. We take advantage of the opportunity to let off steam usually with the one we love, even if they had nothing to do with why we are really angry. We express anger toward this person because it is convenient, instead of dealing with our emotions and searching our hearts as to why we are upset or angry.

The first step in conflict resolution is to analyze ourselves. We all have physical signs in our bodies that take place when we start to become angry. Some of the physical characteristics a person may have are: sweaty hands or face, dry mouth, tension headache, nausea, heartburn, tight jaw, confusion, red face, uncontrolled chattering, and laughing inappropriately, to name a few. Do you recognize any of these in yourself? At the first sign of your physical indictor of anger, you must call for a time out. A time out is when both individuals agree to separate for a time of self-searching and analysis of your motives. This is a time to seek the Lord. Conflict resolution will only work if both individuals agree to apply it. If one person calls a time out and the other person is following them with an avalanche of words, this is not a time out…….

If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.

1 Corinthians 13:1 (NIV)

……….Endeavoring to resolve issues can be like the clashing of two cymbals together that are out of sync with the music. When cymbals are brought together at the appropriate time during a concert, they add a beautiful climax to the symphony being played; however, clash them at the wrong moment, and it can destroy the symphony. We have heard it said “it’s all in the timing,” and this is true when it comes to resolving conflict.

Many facets come into play when resolving conflict. Mastering two of the greatest principles of our faith will enable us not only to resolve conflict but also allow us to live in harmony. Repentance and forgiveness are paramount in our life if we want to be able to resolve conflict and establish good communication skills. Without repentance and forgiveness, there will be no lasting resolution to issues couples may face.

Today I encourage you to retire the boxing gloves and turn them in for; repentance, forgiveness and conflict resolution God’s way.  This blog was taken from excerpts of WE PROMISE ~ 18 Foundational Stones for an Unshakeable Marriage.  For detailed information on conflict resolution read the chapter entitled:  CLASHING CYMBALS.

LIONS AND TIGERS AND bear den! Oh My!

 

Michiganders have a fever right now.  The Lions and Tigers are on a winning streak.  Dan has been down in his bear den watching the big screen and hoping the games are aired on peasant vision (we do not have cable only rabbit ears, so we call that “peasant vision”).  I have been hearing noises drifting up the stairway, a little growling going on down there.  With all these games on TV lately, it has taken me back to my cheerleading days.  This also reminded me of what Dan encourages the young women to do, whenever we teach a pre-marriage class.

Any couple who has attended one of these classes has heard my husband say; “Ladies if you want a champion become his cheerleader, he needs you to be his biggest fan”. 

In marriage we have all been tempted or have fallen into ruts.  Those days where we go through the motions, taking life for granted and letting the “little foxes steal our grapes”, resulting in bitterness.  Despite of what we feel like doing we can always overcome these emotions that try to dictate us, push past them and choose a better way.  Once we have pushed past these emotions and acted rightly we will begin to reap the fruit of this labor of love.  People say; well he or she does not deserve it because they have been doing this or that.  (Please see disclaimer at the end of this article)

Ephesians 5:2(TMSG)
Mostly what God does is love you. Keep company with him and learn a life of love. Observe how Christ loved us. His love was not cautious but extravagant. He didn’t love in order to get something from us but to give everything of himself to us. Love like that.

Edification:  according to Webster means; to build, establish, instruct and improve especially in moral and religious knowledge, uplift, enlighten, inform, inspire, nurture.

Let’s take a look at a few verses and learn about edification from the Word of God.

Psalms 34:13-17(NKJV)
    Keep your tongue from evil,     And your lips from speaking deceit.
    Depart from evil and do good;     Seek peace and pursue it.
    The eyes of the Lord are on the righteous,      And His ears are open to their cry.
    The face of the Lord is against those who do evil,     To cut off the remembrance of them from the earth.
    The righteous cry out, and the Lord hears,      And delivers them out of all their troubles.

Romans 14:19(NKJV)
Therefore let us pursue the things which make for peace and the things by which one may edify another. 

Romans 15:2(NKJV)
Let each of us please his neighbor for his good, leading to edification. 

Hebrews 3:13(NKJV)
but exhort one another daily, while it is called “Today,” lest any of you be hardened through the deceitfulness of sin. 

1 Peter 3:9-17(NKJV)
not returning evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary blessing, knowing that you were called to this, that you may inherit a blessing. 
For      “He who would love life     And see good days,     Let him refrain his tongue from evil,     And his lips from speaking deceit.
    Let him turn away from evil and do good;     Let him seek peace and pursue it.
    For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous,     And His ears are open to their prayers;      But the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.” 
And who is he who will harm you if you become followers of what is good? 
But even if you should suffer for righteousness’ sake, you are blessed. “And do not be afraid of their threats, nor be troubled.”  
But sanctify the Lord God in your hearts, and always be ready to give a defense to everyone who asks you a reason for the hope that is in you, with meekness and fear; 
having a good conscience, that when they defame you as evildoers, those who revile your good conduct in Christ may be ashamed. 
For it is better, if it is the will of God, to suffer for doing good than for doing evil.

Let’s cheer our spouse on today, go ahead - go on a winning streak!

Please read this disclaimer, no amount of edification will work with abusers and where domestic violence is occurring.

Disclaimer: Domestic violence is a grave darkness. As many as one in four women are a victim of domestic violence.[i] These stats are the same for the churched as well as the un-churched. Submission principles as well as conflict resolution will not work in domestic violence. Safety is of the utmost importance. God never intended a woman to be covered with violence. Read Psalm 55 and Malachi 2:14-16. For more information on domestic violence visit: www.abigails.org and www.ndvh.org. If you are a victim of domestic violence, do not access these websites from your home computer.

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[i] Lynette J. Hoy, Safe Relationships, Women’s 10-Weeks Series, 2004. 5.

 

MAGICAL MARRIAGE MOMENT ~ SOS

THE SCENE:

You nicely fall asleep …then it hits.  Literally, sawing logs is in motion (snoring).  Three things cross your mind at this very moment.

1.    Take the pillow and beat your spouse with it.

2.    Leave the bed and go to the couch to sleep for the night.

3.    Fake snore as loudly as possible until your spouse wakes up.

This truly can be turned into a magically moment.

THE MOMENT:

Gently roll your spouse on their side, so they are facing away from you.  Put in earplugs, I personally have been using them for years.  Then cover your spouse in prayer.

SOS:  Sleep Over Snoring

Psalm 3:5 (NKJV)  I lay down and slept; I awoke, for the LORD sustained me.

Psalm 4:8 (NKJV) I will both lie down in peace, and sleep; For You alone, O LORD, make me dwell in safety.

Psalm 127:2 (NKJV) It is vain for you to rise up early, To sit up late, To eat the bread of sorrows; For so He gives His beloved sleep.

Proverbs 3:24 (NKJV) When you lie down, you will not be afraid; Yes, you will lie down and your sleep will be sweet.

Isaiah 29:10 (NKJV) For the LORD has poured out on you The spirit of deep sleep, And has closed your eyes, namely, the prophets;  And He has covered your heads, namely, the seers.

Ecclesiastes 5:12 (NKJV) The sleep of a laboring man is sweet, Whether he eats little or much; But the abundance of the rich will not permit him to sleep.